Saturday Beats

Every Saturday the Double Consciousness team will be posting a piece (or two) from the weekly magazine The Beat Within (see this post to learn more and check out my girlfriend's article on The Beat Within as well).

I Messed Up
I messed up
When my pants began to sag a lil' lower
Started pushin' weight instead of the lawn
I messed up
When I began to flash my rag around
Throwin' gang sings up all over my town
I messed up
When I made my mom's cry
Said I didn't care about life,
Screw livin', I'm gonna die
I messed up
When I started livin' life like a fantasy
Disrespected, neglected, didn't care about
I messed up
When I was posted on the block all night
Seen the enemies
And it was funk on sight
I messed up
When I took the first hit of the blunt
Got in the car, ridin' big, tryna stunt
I messed up
When I didn't want to go to school no more
Put that hoodie on
And went and robbed that liquor store
I messed up
When I stopped listening to my Pops
Did a drive-by
And got away from teh cops
I messed up
When I had to carry my nine
Grand theft auto from scraper to two-seaters
I messed up
When the girl that left,
Might be the one
Did everything for me
Helped me hide when I was on the run
I messed up
When I left the football field and b-ball court
Starting playin' these females
Like my name was Too Short
I messed up
When I began to do more dirt
Caused my real loved ones a lot of pain and
I messed up
When I went from stealing to dealing
Body went numb,
So I had no felling
I messed up
When my problems came
I jsut turned to the bottle
Living life too fast,
Runnin' full throttle
Runnin' at full throttle
I messed up
When I caught this nine-year bid
Livin' like a grown man.
But I'm really just a kid.
-Big Vic, 150 Crew

Sometimes I wonder what this life's about
Sometimes I wonder why I chose this route
Sometimes I wonder why the lights are out
Sometimes I wonder why I poison the body and minds of people for the
Here I stand as a dysfunctional man
Belly-raised by a dysfuncitonal fam
Sometimes I wonder why I never follow my heart
Demons pullin' at my soul till it's ripped apart
Sometimes I wonder why we live and die by the gun
Sometimes I feel it's impossible to do right, like landing on the sun
Sometimes the streets is under pressure and guns errupt
Sometimes I wonder why you turn your back for a second, and realize
your time is up...
-Yung Cutt-e

Image From:
The Beat Within